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I got some of my fire back. I was quite low on frustration nrg and feeling a bit sorry for myself, but I have got some of my fire and 'self' back. Partly because I was able to get into my safe space last night, but also because I finally got to tell Scott where to stick himself, and his arm-floozy Jenni to have a go at buying some self-respect.
Both of them are in our training course, Scott thinks he's gods gift to just about everyone and can't understand why I have a deep intense loathing for him, he's got Ali and Jenni stuck so far up his backside they have to pipe in daylight and it's just like being back in the school playing ground when they get together.
I got stuck working role-plays with Jenni and Ali this afternoon and neither one of them would do any work, they were too busy flirting with Scott and talking about Jenni's boob op. In the end I very loudly said "after work, you can all screw each others brains out for all I care, but for now will you try and at least pretend you're in the workplace and get me through this before Scott starts drooling!"
Everyone for a 4 cubicle area heard and laughed, and as predicted, both behaved like stupid teenagers and hotly denied anything at least long enough to get through the role plays, then afterwards went back to 'heavy petting' in a corner while I got my first set of tests done.
I used to think I was remarkably tolerant, but that kind of thing is incredibly inappropriate at work, especially in a training atmosphere where I'm trying to concentrate, at one point if Jenni had giggled one more time I would have reached around and slapped her!
I have another 3 weeks of this to look forward to so tomorrow morning I will be having a quiet word with Michelle, the trainer, to ask her to seperate them and make them keep it down. I was possibly a little mouthy with them this afternoon but they brought it on themselves and, apart from odd occasions, for the past month or so my inner-Lioness has been controlling my mouth.
On the plus side I passed the first 3 of my tests and got to spend an hour on the phones with Sab, listening to applications and chatting about the system which really helped underpin the knowledge I am getting in the classroom.
Tonight I am having my first go at cooking curry from scratch, using the technique and planning edumacation I got from helping![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
nutter4 in the kitchen sometime ago. I'm quite excited, but also scared.
Getting back to my safe space last night really felt like wading through treacle, the more I tried, the harder it got, but eventually I was able to see my space and get into it with no interference. I had a bad nightmare about it night before last, where I was trying to get through my door, but Charlie was nailing boards over it and I couldn't stop him. I was quite badly affected by it and still shaky yesterday, but after I resolved to keep trying until I broke the cycle of worry I seem to be a bit more settled today which is good.
*hugs and extra energy to them as needs it, I seem to have plenty at the moment.
Both of them are in our training course, Scott thinks he's gods gift to just about everyone and can't understand why I have a deep intense loathing for him, he's got Ali and Jenni stuck so far up his backside they have to pipe in daylight and it's just like being back in the school playing ground when they get together.
I got stuck working role-plays with Jenni and Ali this afternoon and neither one of them would do any work, they were too busy flirting with Scott and talking about Jenni's boob op. In the end I very loudly said "after work, you can all screw each others brains out for all I care, but for now will you try and at least pretend you're in the workplace and get me through this before Scott starts drooling!"
Everyone for a 4 cubicle area heard and laughed, and as predicted, both behaved like stupid teenagers and hotly denied anything at least long enough to get through the role plays, then afterwards went back to 'heavy petting' in a corner while I got my first set of tests done.
I used to think I was remarkably tolerant, but that kind of thing is incredibly inappropriate at work, especially in a training atmosphere where I'm trying to concentrate, at one point if Jenni had giggled one more time I would have reached around and slapped her!
I have another 3 weeks of this to look forward to so tomorrow morning I will be having a quiet word with Michelle, the trainer, to ask her to seperate them and make them keep it down. I was possibly a little mouthy with them this afternoon but they brought it on themselves and, apart from odd occasions, for the past month or so my inner-Lioness has been controlling my mouth.
On the plus side I passed the first 3 of my tests and got to spend an hour on the phones with Sab, listening to applications and chatting about the system which really helped underpin the knowledge I am getting in the classroom.
Tonight I am having my first go at cooking curry from scratch, using the technique and planning edumacation I got from helping
nutter4 in the kitchen sometime ago. I'm quite excited, but also scared. Getting back to my safe space last night really felt like wading through treacle, the more I tried, the harder it got, but eventually I was able to see my space and get into it with no interference. I had a bad nightmare about it night before last, where I was trying to get through my door, but Charlie was nailing boards over it and I couldn't stop him. I was quite badly affected by it and still shaky yesterday, but after I resolved to keep trying until I broke the cycle of worry I seem to be a bit more settled today which is good.
*hugs and extra energy to them as needs it, I seem to have plenty at the moment.
